Stop This Train

taking a reference from a wonderful (and a new obsession of mine) John Mayer.

I have had such a wonderful Christmas and holiday. I hope others have too. I was able to catch up with a lot of wonderful friends, which has been great! i am excited to go back to school though and go back to what now feels more like my own room, back in Indiana. I have painted more than i think i ever have before in my life, and listened to more music than i think is healthy. but i have loved every minute of it! i work 3 days this break, including tomorrow and monday! which i love work so it is a o.k.! haa! i got to see the girls i worked with this summer which was SO great to see them!

tomorrow it is my parents anniversary so i think we will do something special for them! it’s their 22nd!!! so yeah that is just a little update!


Home again

I am back at home, after my first ten hour road trip with 2 peers, and I am starting to realize that home has a new definition. As much as I love being home, I have come to realize that it means something totally different than it used to. I am living out of a duffle bag in my own house. The ladies at my church- some of them don’t even recognize me, and others hadn’t even known I had gone! The kids at the High School that I had occupied for the past four years were totally different, and they behaved in ways that seemed foreign and childish to me. I haven’t seen any of my High School friends yet, but just from hearing their stories it sounds like the friendships we had cherished will be very different now.

As much as all of this upset me at first, I realized that it is much less everything around me changing, and much more that I am growing up and that it is my change- rather than everyone elses- that has caused this small feeling of homelessness.

Where does a first semester freshman find home? It is no longer in her house, or among her old friends. It can’t truly be at college because school is very well known to be, almost like a hotel; it is there for temporary use.

I guess that is where we are called to grow. I after continuous transitions am beginning to learn that it is in the midst of transition, that the most growth is able to occur. Transition calls us out of our comfort zone, and to rely on that very being that is greater than all which we can imagine.

So as I find myself in transition again, and as I find myself once again growing and transforming, I also find myself needing to lean on the One and Only who can help me. He, in the midst of all this, is my home and will never forsake me.

First Semester

Taylor has been such an incredible blessing to me. It has been challenging; yet, it has helped me survive the challenges and grow closer to God.

God has been teaching me a lot this year, showing me some of my insecurities that I did not realize I had, as well as awakening some gifts and passions long buried.

I went through the ups and downs of what I should major in, and can admit to having changed my major twice thus far. (I am currently a social work major with an art minor.) My dream is to work with people in need, most likely refugees… and somehow use my art to help them.

Just the other day I felt it pressed on my heart to do a concentration series of the refugee experience. I felt like God had finally given me a little piece to the puzzle. YAY! We will see what happens.

I have a voice… generally a loud one- and I have so much on my heart. I have come to realize now that God has given me this passion and voice and personality for a reason. He has a message for me to give, and right now seems to be the time for preparation before I give it. I want to help people and I want to make a difference in the world, but I am starting to realize, that God is preparing me for the big plans he has, and has other plans for me right now, that will be a foundation for me to build off of when I am ready.


So, if any of you are discouraged… and feel like you are unusable… know that GOD IS DYING TO USE YOU NOW!!! Be a loving friend, be praying and seeking God, he will not waste your time.

God bless,